Our letter to our beautiful baby girl Edy when she died at 19 days old

Our Beautiful Edy Charlotte,

               We are at a loss for eloquent words, so we will just do the best we can…  

Sweet Baby, we have planned for you for almost 5 years.  We envisioned having the most beautiful princess… and I must admit we really outdid ourselves. Perfect Beauty…  

               There is honestly not one single feature that we could have 

changed that would have made you more beautiful.  Your hair is as soft as a favorite t-shirt that has been washed one thousand times in one thousand bottles of fabric softener (because Momma always uses too much).  Your ears are so tiny and dainty.  We had already planned on buying the most beautiful diamond earrings for our sweet girl.  We loved seeing your sparkling eyes every time you opened them.  We intuitively know in our hearts that you were looking at us with excitement about the fact that you had the most loving parents.  We just knew you had decided to keep us J! 

               We were so excited to polish your tiny little fingernails and toenails.  

We wondered what your favorite color would be, your favorite food, your favorite everything… Your Momma couldn’t wait to show you that your Daddy is a perfect example of the type of man that you should marry when you grow up.  Your Daddy couldn’t wait to watch you grow in the likeness of your mother.  To see you become a generous, kindhearted woman with warmth and a hopelessly optimistic approach to the world. 

               When you were unhooked from all of your tubes and the 

machines were turned off, there was the most peaceful silence.  A dark and ominous rain cloud lurked over the hospital.  Literally, the very moment we sat down to hold you while you died in our arms, from the clouds emerged a distinct opening and the brightest ray of light shone into your window and continued to shine for the next 20 minutes until your heart stopped beating and you breathed your last breath.

               Your Daddy and I promised right then and there that we will 

never forget you.  We miss you so much everyday and we always will.  We also promised to always openly express our feelings of sadness to each other and to always be there for each other.  We promised we would continue to so a great job of raising your big sister, Emma and your big brother, Jacob.

               Emma and Jacob don’t quite understand why 

you are gone.  They were so upset because they just wanted to hold you and love you.  We want everyone to know how absolutely amazing and strong you were for the 19 days that you were with us.  We have already decided to think of you and what you endured to stay with us for your short life whenever we think we are having a bad day.  We will never understand why you were taken from us, but we are so grateful to have had you for the time that you were ours.

Love,

Momma & Daddy